Komfodxuck is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, selfish octopus.

Komfodxuck created the planet Venus eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Komfodxuck, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Komfodxuck, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Komfodxuck's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Komfodxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Erect nine zinc sculptures of Komfodxuck on top of important buildings.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never talk about dogs.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never wear violet scarves.