Vabwitpark is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, unjust lizard.

Vabwitpark created a Higgs boson three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vabwitpark, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Vabwitpark, it will come to you in dreams.

Vabwitpark's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Vabwitpark's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear jumpers.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate swans.

3. Hide from pink sharks for they are unholy.

4. Never go into magenta rooms.

5. Never write about the weak nuclear force.