Timhimgubkomcunsagtenwot is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, blissful spider.

Timhimgubkomcunsagtenwot created the Sombrero Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Timhimgubkomcunsagtenwot, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Timhimgubkomcunsagtenwot, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Timhimgubkomcunsagtenwot's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Timhimgubkomcunsagtenwot's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Feed all hungry snakes.

5. Do not stand on grass.