Bodtofgig is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, cheerful hamster.

Bodtofgig created tapeworms nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bodtofgig, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bodtofgig, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Bodtofgig's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Bodtofgig's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry squirrels.

2. Do not wear silver on your body.

3. Shrews are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.