Zaggedmid is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, all-powerful squid.

Zaggedmid created matter six million years ago.

If you believe in Zaggedmid, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Zaggedmid, he will turn you into a puffin.

Zaggedmid's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Zaggedmid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt aardvarks.

2. Never write about nebulae.

3. Always help nematodes.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Erect a large lead sculpture of Zaggedmid on top of all buildings.