Rutpogcap is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, unfair fish.

Rutpogcap created a bottom quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rutpogcap, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Rutpogcap, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Rutpogcap's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Rutpogcap's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your head fawn.

2. Never talk about nebulae.

3. Always obey Rutpogcap's priests.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Rutpogcap must be the most important thing in your life.