Tamtailnill is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, wise gnu.

Tamtailnill created an up quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Tamtailnill, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Tamtailnill, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Tamtailnill's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Tamtailnill's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Put Tamtailnill first in all things.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not hurt gulls.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tamtailnill.