Dogdamquill is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, almighty fly.

Dogdamquill created the Whirlpool Galaxy four years ago.

If you believe in Dogdamquill, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Dogdamquill, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Dogdamquill's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Dogdamquill's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Dogdamquill.

2. Dogdamquill loves sharks, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not trade with those who eat beans.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.