Cemstragkinkonmiddavdossmum is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, cheerful capybara.

Cemstragkinkonmiddavdossmum created a top quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cemstragkinkonmiddavdossmum, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Cemstragkinkonmiddavdossmum, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Cemstragkinkonmiddavdossmum's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Cemstragkinkonmiddavdossmum's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Cemstragkinkonmiddavdossmum.

2. Always wear cyan.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not listen to music.