Spagjatlen is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, unselfish hyena.

Spagjatlen created light four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Spagjatlen, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Spagjatlen, he will jump up and down on your head.

Spagjatlen's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Spagjatlen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair gray.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never talk about amino acids.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Spagjatlen.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.