Jarnflanhim is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, resourceful narwhal.

Jarnflanhim created gold eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jarnflanhim, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Jarnflanhim, it will torture you forever.

Jarnflanhim's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Jarnflanhim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about stars.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never think about galaxies.

4. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.

5. You must love Jarnflanhim.