Hogtaildiss Kamdanrak is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, capable jackal.

Hogtaildiss Kamdanrak created Africa four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hogtaildiss Kamdanrak, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Hogtaildiss Kamdanrak, he will curse you with boils.

Hogtaildiss Kamdanrak's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Hogtaildiss Kamdanrak's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Hide from indigo birds for they are unholy.

4. Never jump in the presence of aardvarks.

5. Do not eat wheat.