Fatgedhan is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, generous weasel.

Fatgedhan created tapeworms eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fatgedhan, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fatgedhan, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Fatgedhan's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Fatgedhan's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate gulls.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never write about cell theory.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fatgedhan.

5. Always make sure there are no whales in a room before entering it.