Nellquartjig is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, conceited raven.

Nellquartjig created tapeworms seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Nellquartjig, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Nellquartjig, it will destroy your home planet.

Nellquartjig's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Nellquartjig's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Do not speak about peanuts.

4. Do not wear blue clothing.

5. Nellquartjig must be the most important thing in your life.