Cimhakrakzandiss is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, unselfish bee.

Cimhakrakzandiss created the planet Mars seven million years ago.

If you believe in Cimhakrakzandiss, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Cimhakrakzandiss, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Cimhakrakzandiss' most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Cimhakrakzandiss' Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Always make sure there are no doves in a building before entering it.

3. Never wear gray hats.

4. Feed all hungry turtles.

5. Do not shave your chest.