Cudwongovteen is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, self-confident crow.

Cudwongovteen created a top quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cudwongovteen, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cudwongovteen, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Cudwongovteen's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Cudwongovteen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Cudwongovteen loves whales, so they must be respected.

5. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.