Daptadkab is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, irritating aardvark.

Daptadkab created the Black Eye Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Daptadkab, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Daptadkab, he will ignore you.

Daptadkab's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Daptadkab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not wear purple clothing.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.