Sagfligbad is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, dishonourable unicorn.

Sagfligbad created carbon two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sagfligbad, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Sagfligbad, he will turn you into a rock.

Sagfligbad's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Sagfligbad's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in holy places.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Sagfligbad.

4. Never write about black holes.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.
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