Kapnigsit is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, boastful frog.

Kapnigsit created viruses two billion years ago.

If you believe in Kapnigsit, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Kapnigsit, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Kapnigsit's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Kapnigsit's Holy Commandments

1. Kapnigsit loves grasshopers, so they must be honoured.

2. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

3. Kapnigsit loves bats, so they must be respected.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not wear carbon on your body.