Zigzakmab is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, omniscient coyote.

Zigzakmab created a Higgs boson nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Zigzakmab, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Zigzakmab, it will cry a lot.

Zigzakmab's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Zigzakmab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never write about galaxies.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Zigzakmab.

5. Never talk about planets.