Gebwegdussgemham is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, confident cobra.

Gebwegdussgemham created Africa two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gebwegdussgemham, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gebwegdussgemham, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Gebwegdussgemham's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Gebwegdussgemham's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about comets.

2. Never feed pineapples to dolphins while wearing blue shirts.

3. Always obey Gebwegdussgemham's priests.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never talk about cell theory.