Wodtinhan is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, selfish cow.

Wodtinhan created dark matter two billion years ago.

If you believe in Wodtinhan, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Wodtinhan, it will laugh at you.

Wodtinhan's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Wodtinhan's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Wodtinhan on top of all buildings.

2. Never run near frogs.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Put Wodtinhan first in all things.

5. You must never eat lentils.