Wabfutlenvad is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, annoying badger.

Wabfutlenvad created dark energy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wabfutlenvad, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Wabfutlenvad, he will manifest in front of you.

Wabfutlenvad's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Wabfutlenvad's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate turtles.

2. Never look at asteroids.

3. Do not trade with those who eat lemons.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Wabfutlenvad.