Cussnarlhap is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, narcissistic ant.

Cussnarlhap created light three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cussnarlhap, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cussnarlhap, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Cussnarlhap's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Cussnarlhap's Holy Commandments

1. Snakes are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never talk about galaxies.

3. Never wear ear rings.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.