Gomvinlit is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, tiresome cobra.

Gomvinlit created a quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gomvinlit, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Gomvinlit, she will jump up and down on your head.

Gomvinlit's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Gomvinlit's Holy Commandments

1. Cats are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Do not dye your hair fawn.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not trade with those who eat apples.