Arfhadfab is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, quiet faun.

Arfhadfab created light five million years ago.

If you believe in Arfhadfab, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Arfhadfab, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Arfhadfab's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Arfhadfab's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not trade with those who eat apples.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate great tits.

5. Never eat bark.