Timcudbast is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, flying dugong.

Timcudbast created humanity five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Timcudbast, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Timcudbast, he will send minions to preach to you.

Timcudbast's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Timcudbast's Holy Commandments

1. Tortoises are not to be trusted.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Timcudbast.

3. Do not wear cyan clothing.

4. Feed all hungry great tits.

5. Respect your elders.