Zakcemcebnutt is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, thoughtless human.

Zakcemcebnutt created the Small Magellanic Cloud two years ago.

If you believe in Zakcemcebnutt, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Zakcemcebnutt, he will send minions to preach to you.

Zakcemcebnutt's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Zakcemcebnutt's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit near gulls.

2. Manatees are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not wear platinum on your body.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Always wear yellow.