Cemjatdamlargflagfet is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, resourceful guinea pig.

Cemjatdamlargflagfet created dark matter six billion years ago.

If you believe in Cemjatdamlargflagfet, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cemjatdamlargflagfet, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Cemjatdamlargflagfet's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Cemjatdamlargflagfet's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry rats.

2. Erect three tin sculptures of Cemjatdamlargflagfet on top of important buildings.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Voles are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.