Rigganquam is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, temperamental cow.

Rigganquam created viruses nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rigganquam, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Rigganquam, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Rigganquam's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Rigganquam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your face.

2. Always treat frogs with great respect.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate otters.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never wear corsets.