Janlimgudgab Tannullim is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, sapient finch.

Janlimgudgab Tannullim created a Higgs boson two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Janlimgudgab Tannullim, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Janlimgudgab Tannullim, it will turn you into a frog.

Janlimgudgab Tannullim's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Janlimgudgab Tannullim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Run away from violet geese, for they are unholy.

3. Never feed lentils to badgers while wearing indigo jumpers.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Janlimgudgab Tannullim.

5. Do not shave your legs.