Nanlibwap is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, stupid pigeon.

Nanlibwap created humankind twelve years ago.

If you believe in Nanlibwap, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Nanlibwap, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Nanlibwap's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Nanlibwap's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Nanlibwap's priests.

2. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Always help sick rats.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.