Pidnaknart is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, charitable cat.

Pidnaknart created Mount Everest five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pidnaknart, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Pidnaknart, he will turn you into a frog.

Pidnaknart's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Pidnaknart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

2. Always help mites.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Snakes are unholy and should not be approached.

5. You must never eat lemons.