Milyartzed is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, self-confident porpoise.

Milyartzed created viruses four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Milyartzed, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Milyartzed, she will jump up and down on your head.

Milyartzed's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Milyartzed's Holy Commandments

1. Hamsters are not to be trusted.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Milyartzed.

3. Hide from black dogs for they are unholy.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Worship no other gods but Milyartzed.