Tigtabjig is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, conceited squid.

Tigtabjig created the Sombrero Galaxy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tigtabjig, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Tigtabjig, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Tigtabjig's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Tigtabjig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about black holes.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Tigtabjig.

4. Never think ill of sick horses.

5. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Tigtabjig on top of all buildings.