Flatpanboggud Larpwadmad is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, humane whale.

Flatpanboggud Larpwadmad created the Sombrero Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Flatpanboggud Larpwadmad, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Flatpanboggud Larpwadmad, he will boil you in a big pot.

Flatpanboggud Larpwadmad's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Flatpanboggud Larpwadmad's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Never hurt ants.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never paint your face orange.