Larnlidafwig is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, passionate warg.

Larnlidafwig created Asia four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Larnlidafwig, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Larnlidafwig, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Larnlidafwig's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Larnlidafwig's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Larnlidafwig.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Never feed strawberries to porpoises while wearing white jumpers.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Hide from turquoise foxes for they are unholy.