Onthindoss is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, irritating penguin.

Onthindoss created Mount Everest four million years ago.

If you believe in Onthindoss, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Onthindoss, he will throw large rocks at you.

Onthindoss' most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Onthindoss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never talk about amino acids.

3. Erect six nickel sculptures of Onthindoss on top of important buildings.

4. Do not speak about pineapples.

5. You must never eat lentils.