Ligcinbim is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, uncaring wyrm.

Ligcinbim created time and space six billion years ago.

If you believe in Ligcinbim, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Ligcinbim, it will turn you into a mouse.

Ligcinbim's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Ligcinbim's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from black doves, for they are unholy.

2. Never wear mauve jumpers.

3. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Retreat if eight aardvarks approach from the north.