Dudarpfenjat Talcaplaportsagnil is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, almighty bat.

Dudarpfenjat Talcaplaportsagnil created the cosmos seven million years ago.

If you believe in Dudarpfenjat Talcaplaportsagnil, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dudarpfenjat Talcaplaportsagnil, it will throw large rocks at you.

Dudarpfenjat Talcaplaportsagnil's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Dudarpfenjat Talcaplaportsagnil's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

3. Never think ill of sick nematodes.

4. Do not trade with those who eat lentils.

5. Never go into cyan rooms.