Bugjadjad Tonxuccub Nuttnilhig is a god.

It takes the form of a large, self-confident squirrel.

Bugjadjad Tonxuccub Nuttnilhig created the Sol system eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bugjadjad Tonxuccub Nuttnilhig, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bugjadjad Tonxuccub Nuttnilhig, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Bugjadjad Tonxuccub Nuttnilhig's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Bugjadjad Tonxuccub Nuttnilhig's Holy Commandments

1. Always help geese in need.

2. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Bugjadjad Tonxuccub Nuttnilhig on top of all buildings.

3. Always make sure there are no tapirs in a building before entering it.

4. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

5. Do not drink alcohol.