Suglistwab is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, happy crow.

Suglistwab created viruses four million years ago.

If you believe in Suglistwab, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Suglistwab, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Suglistwab's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Suglistwab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Worship no other gods but Suglistwab.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Run away from black voles, for they are unholy.

5. Do not drink water in red rooms.