Loopvilsig Farnsafvig is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, dishonourable camel.

Loopvilsig Farnsafvig created the planet Saturn three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Loopvilsig Farnsafvig, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Loopvilsig Farnsafvig, it will turn you into a plant.

Loopvilsig Farnsafvig's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Loopvilsig Farnsafvig's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Put Loopvilsig Farnsafvig first in all things.

3. Hide if six eagles approach from the west.

4. Never laugh in holy places.

5. Pray towards the north.