Rilquatkan is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, egotistical duck.

Rilquatkan created snails five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rilquatkan, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Rilquatkan, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Rilquatkan's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Rilquatkan's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always help sick otters.

3. Put Rilquatkan first in all things.

4. Never wear trousers.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.