Linontjon is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, temperamental crocodile.

Linontjon created the Andromeda Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Linontjon, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Linontjon, she will think nothing of it.

Linontjon's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Linontjon's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never feed bananas to voles while wearing indigo stockings.