Fitbodyim is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, humorless fox.

Fitbodyim created Mount Everest nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fitbodyim, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Fitbodyim, she will think nothing of it.

Fitbodyim's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Fitbodyim's Holy Commandments

1. Put Fitbodyim first in all things.

2. Always help cats in need.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate dogs.

4. Do not wear gray clothing.

5. Do not commit murder.