Vilwapbonkkomlig Lakquillgep is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, compassionate alligator.

Vilwapbonkkomlig Lakquillgep created an electron five million years ago.

If you believe in Vilwapbonkkomlig Lakquillgep, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Vilwapbonkkomlig Lakquillgep, she will not care at all.

Vilwapbonkkomlig Lakquillgep's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Vilwapbonkkomlig Lakquillgep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never talk about seals.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Never wear stockings.