Getyamzig Yar is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, slow yak.

Getyamzig Yar created dark matter six million years ago.

If you believe in Getyamzig Yar, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Getyamzig Yar, it will cry a lot.

Getyamzig Yar's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Getyamzig Yar's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Getyamzig Yar.

3. Do not hurt great tits.

4. Always make sure there are no sharks in a building before entering it.

5. Do not stand on grass.