Kimvenbumjab Xinpoggar Higappnel is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, omniscient dragonfly.

Kimvenbumjab Xinpoggar Higappnel created viruses two billion years ago.

If you believe in Kimvenbumjab Xinpoggar Higappnel, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Kimvenbumjab Xinpoggar Higappnel, she will strike you with lightening.

Kimvenbumjab Xinpoggar Higappnel's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Kimvenbumjab Xinpoggar Higappnel's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat rice.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never look at asteroids.

5. Do not hurt turtles.