Sandzigcet is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, witty skunk.

Sandzigcet created humankind six million years ago.

If you believe in Sandzigcet, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Sandzigcet, it will cry a lot.

Sandzigcet's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Sandzigcet's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear magenta.

2. Do not trade with those who eat lentils.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.